Telling Martha Goodbye - Part 2

(Continued from Telling Martha Goodbye - Part 1)

"The more I prayed about what God would have me do, the more I realized He was calling me to make some tough decisions. I needed to pray and allow God to show me what He wanted me involved in, and focus on those things. Easier said than done. I loved everything I was a part of. I was on leadership for two different groups, I thoroughly enjoyed spending time with my friends every night of the weekend, what on earth would I do away with?!

I kept handing it over to God and He kept telling me to wait on Him. Until recently..."

Last Wednesday, March 18, 2009, I was at Life Group. The lesson talked about obedience and sacrifice, which got me praying...again. I told God I wanted to honor Him with my time and asked Him again to show me what to keep and what to do away with. We finished the lesson, we spent some time chit-chatting, we all went our separate ways. I hadn't made it to the gym that morning, so I was driving to Anytime Fitness in town before I headed home. I thought I would be cute and razz Jason a little about my dedication working out at 9:30pm, so I shot him a quick text message. He replied and I was on my way.

I finished my workout and checked my phone. Jason had sent me another message asking if I would be at Thursday night Life Group the next evening. I told him I wouldn't and he replied:

"Are you ever coming back?"

I was honest and told him I wasn't sure, I was still praying about it. I asked if he had any insight into the situation (he gives great advice!) and he told me he might. Jason asked if I had a second to talk and we spent the next hour on the phone.

I spent 80% of that hour talking through my decision. I told him what I liked about each thing I was a part of. I told him which things I wasn't willing to give up. I told him which things I was on the fence about. He just let me talk. At one point, while pausing to get a breath, I prayed again..."show me what You want me to do with my schedule." And then, that voice that I could pick out anywhere came through loud and clear.

"You already know. I've told you. Trust it."

At that moment everything came into focus. I enjoyed everything that I was involved in, but two areas really spoke to me and fell high on my list of priorities. I loved Pathways and it's ministry, and I was honored to be part of it's leadership. I was excited to get to know the people in my Wednesday Life Group more, and the lessons it's leaders picked out challenged me and made me think. I loved Thursday night Life Group, and being part of it's leadership, but it felt like I had outgrown it. It was a huge blessing to me when I first came to Pathways and allowed me to make some life-long friendships...but I was ready to move on. It had become a time for me to socialize more than a time to focus on God and what He had planned for me.

I told Jason I knew what I needed to do and explained what I thought I was hearing. Him agreeing with what I was feeling was all the confirmation I needed. It would be hard to step down from Thursday nights, I would miss many of the people I met in the group, but I had to be obedient to God's instruction.

I know now that God's answer to my prayers came in the form of a good friend letting me talk things out. Jason listening to my ramblings allowed me to put things in perspective.

"For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks."
(Luke 6:45b, NIV)

The things that meant the most to me were the things I spoke of. The things God was really laying on my heart made themselves clear to me because they were the things I couldn't stop telling Jason about. I was to shift my focus fully to Pathways leadership and allow my time at Wednesday night Life Group to recharge me and challenge my faith. It was time to move away from Thursday night Life Group and allow someone else the opportunity to serve that group.

Stepping away from something I looked forward to and enjoyed wasn't easy. It wasn't without a few moments of second-guessing my decision to leave. Some things God puts into my life just for a season...just so they can serve their purpose...and then it's time to let them go.

I am excited to see what God has in store for me going forward. I'm eager to go where He sends me. I plan to use the time I've freed up on Thursday to spend time in His presence...there is no season for my relationship with Him.

I still have quite a ways to go in my quest to leave my inner-Martha in the kitchen, but I know this was a great start.

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."
(Luke 10:41-42, NIV)